Hurry up, Summer!
The natives are restless. About this time of the year, everyone loses their filter. Students say whatever comes to mind. And so do their teachers.
Student: “Anyone have any paper? I’ll dance for paper.”
Student One: “Are you smelling your shoe?” Student Two: “No, I was trying to see if I could hang it from my nose.”
Student: “Do you want to get ripped in three and a half minutes? All you need is a Powerade and a banana.”
Student: “Saturday I got flipped off. So to make myself feel better…I made brownies.”
Student: “After all the hard word, studying, turning 14, and being born a genius, earning my driver’s permit put me on a whole new level of awesomeness.”
Student beginning her speech. “Please bear with me. I have allergies and sound like a man.”
Me: “Let’s say you want to improve the cafeteria. You want Fish Friday…Tuna Tuesday…Um…” Student: “Weenie Wednesday?”
Me: “Tell me about a favorite teacher.” Student: “My science teacher. He was the best.” Me: “What’s his name?” Student: “I don’t remember.”
Student: “My sister has stopped eating in the cafeteria due to their new flavor called boredom.”
Student: “I decided if we colonize the moon and have a night club, this is how we’d dance…” (Proceeds to demonstrate)
Me: “If you could create a holiday, what would it be?” Student: “Party Like a Rock Star Day. Everyone would get leopard thongs.”
Me: “Finish this sentence. I hope____________.” Student: “I hope I live after my parents see my final grades.”
Me: “What is the first thing you do after school?” Student: “If I feel the talent wind blow my way, I will play the piano.”
Student: “Spell oppose.” Me: “O-P-P-O-S-E.” Student laughing: “You said pee-pee.”
Me: “What is your typical summer day like?” Student: “I wake up at two p.m…and put on some heavy deodorant.”
Me: “OH. MY. GOSH! I have THREE shirts on and NONE of them are covering what they’re supposed to.” Looking around. “That was too much information, wasn’t it?”
Have a great weekend!
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11 Comments so far
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The “oppose” is genius! Much better than the “I cup” I grew up with.
I know. Besides I think the correct “teacher” response to those “how do you spell” questions is supposed to be “Look it up.” I always forget that.
You are SO funny! I love the “oppose” one. Kind of like the word duty. I’m too old to think that’s funny, but I still do!
That’s hilarious! I was just laughing the whole time reading this
I tutor at a high school, and these kids – especially the freshmen – are beginning to go insane. And are taking me with them.
DUTY still cracks me up too! It was a running theme/gag with Chandler on Friends, too. Did you see those episodes?
And Edge, at a certain point you just have to accept defeat and join them, throwing pretty much all traces of professionalism out the window. : )
Duty….Too FUNNY…DUTY, Dooty…DUTY…make me laugh everytime…
That’s hilarious! I didn’t know the “duty” one. Seriously, though, has summer taken a detour or something? It’s taking so long to get here!
That was very funny
Haha wow! those are great… very intertaining to read! lol
i love it!
It sounds like my classmates
Teacher “what do you wanna be when you grow up?”
My bffl ” a flying ninja unicorn” ( insert serious stare) LOL! this stuff is just priceless