Hurry up, Summer!

The natives are restless. About this time of the year, everyone loses their filter. Students say whatever comes to mind. And so do their teachers.

Student: “Anyone have any paper? I’ll dance for paper.”

Student One: “Are you smelling your shoe?” Student Two: “No, I was trying to see if I could hang it from my nose.”

Student: “Do you want to get ripped in three and a half minutes? All you need is a Powerade and a banana.”

Student: “Saturday I got flipped off. So to make myself feel better…I made brownies.”

Student: “After all the hard word, studying, turning 14, and being born a genius, earning my driver’s permit put me on a whole new level of awesomeness.”

Student beginning her speech. “Please bear with me. I have allergies and sound like a man.”

Me: “Let’s say you want to improve the cafeteria. You want Fish Friday…Tuna Tuesday…Um…” Student: “Weenie Wednesday?”

Me: “Tell me about a favorite teacher.” Student: “My science teacher. He was the best.” Me: “What’s his name?” Student: “I don’t remember.”

Student: “My sister has stopped eating in the cafeteria due to their new flavor called boredom.”

Student: “I decided if we colonize the moon and have a night club, this is how we’d dance…” (Proceeds to demonstrate)

Me: “If you could create a holiday, what would it be?” Student: “Party Like a Rock Star Day. Everyone would get leopard thongs.”

Me: “Finish this sentence. I hope____________.” Student: “I hope I live after my parents see my final grades.”

Me: “What is the first thing you do after school?” Student: “If I feel the talent wind blow my way, I will play the piano.”

Student: “Spell oppose.” Me: “O-P-P-O-S-E.” Student laughing: “You said pee-pee.”

Me: “What is your typical summer day like?” Student: “I wake up at two p.m…and put on some heavy deodorant.”

Me: “OH. MY. GOSH! I have THREE shirts on and NONE of them are covering what they’re supposed to.” Looking around. “That was too much information, wasn’t it?”

Have a great weekend!


  1. Jenny says

    I know. Besides I think the correct “teacher” response to those “how do you spell” questions is supposed to be “Look it up.” I always forget that.

  2. Rhonda says

    You are SO funny! I love the “oppose” one. Kind of like the word duty. I’m too old to think that’s funny, but I still do!

  3. says

    I tutor at a high school, and these kids – especially the freshmen – are beginning to go insane. And are taking me with them.

  4. Jen says

    DUTY still cracks me up too! It was a running theme/gag with Chandler on Friends, too. Did you see those episodes?

    And Edge, at a certain point you just have to accept defeat and join them, throwing pretty much all traces of professionalism out the window. : )

  5. Sarah says

    That’s hilarious! I didn’t know the “duty” one. Seriously, though, has summer taken a detour or something? It’s taking so long to get here!

  6. Sarah says

    It sounds like my classmates
    Teacher “what do you wanna be when you grow up?”
    My bffl ” a flying ninja unicorn” ( insert serious stare) LOL! this stuff is just priceless 😉

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