Win The Big Picture–Last Day!
Due to a little glitch, your chance to win a super fantabulous copy of The Big Picture has been extended through today! WOW! It’s like a BOGO sale extended at Payless. But not.
Just leave a comment by tonight, and you are entered to win the mother of all prizes. A book.
So yeah, Friday night I went to Barnes and Noble for the midnight release party of Breaking Dawn. I haven’t read it yet (get in line Stephenie Meyer, I have other books ahead of you!), but I have GOT TO soon because I feel so left out of the conversation. EVERYWHERE I go everyone is talking about this book. I must admit to picking it up last night and skimming through it. And what I read did not make me happy. Honestly I’m not a Twilight series devotee. I adored book one, but after that I lost that lovin’ feeling. I really struggled with books two and ESPECIALLY book three. But we’ll see. All I know is if I had a vampire baby I would NOT name it Renesmee (Renee + Esme–geez). And I would be having my mom babysit. A LOT. So Mother, be prepared. If I ever have any vamp babies, you will need to clear your schedule and break out the pack-n-play. And then at age five, of course, it will be shipped off to boarding school. Where it will write me sad, pathetic notes about the other kids making fun of it’s fangs. But those are the breaks, Vampy Baby. Ick.
So we made our first ever video spoof Friday night for Breaking Dawn. It was . . . interesting. The snacks were good though. I loaded my helpers down with Snickers, Oreos, Twix, Reeses, and for those who couldn’t handle all the sugar and wanted something in an actual food group–Cheetos! (dairy, of course!)
My helpers did a great job.
Moi (with a REALLY bad hair choice), Kelsey, Allie, Amy, and Stephanie W.
Aren’t our shirts cute? The best one was Go Wolf or Go Home, but that student isn’t in the pic.
In one section of Barnes and Noble there was this entire end cap of Harlequin type of books. BOY have those things changed! My grandma used to read them. . . um, not anymore! You would not BELIEVE the titles of these things! Like this one…(WARNING kids, PG18 cover here!)
The Millionaires Inexperienced Love-Slave? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? And look at the picture. That is a great hot tub though–right in FRONT of the Sydney Opera House! I’m so freakin’ sure! Grandma, if you are still reading this stuff, I am very disappointed. (But if you have this particular one, I’d like to borrow it…for research purposes…)
But could that title be any funnier? They were all that way. No finesse whatsoever. Like The Story About His Girlfriend Who Only Wore Undies On Sunday. Or The Guy Who Was An Undercover Cop. And When I Say Undercover, That Is A Play On Words. I kept telling the girls to look away. But then they’d find a good one, and we’d all be gathered around it laughing. And then I’d come to my senses again. “No! Stop! Turn away! Resist!” Finally I had to flip all the covers. (Sorry Harlequin authors!)
And who knows when our video will be ready. It’s sitting on my camcorder…and that’s as far as I’ve gotten. I have no idea what to do with it. It’s like once I hit 25, any techie intelligence I had just evaporated. I really need to figure it out though if for no other reason than to show the bloopers. They’re my favorite. Anyway, thanks to all my helpers. So much fun! But it STRESSED me out. I had scripts for everyone, and as I was rehearsing my lines in the car on the way there (out loud), I missed my exit on the interstate.
I’m seriously about to choke a cat. I made the mistake of letting Miller outside, and the first time it scared him to death and he threw himself at the door to get back in. So we tried it again. . . and now it’s like meth. He can’t get enough. There’s NO getting it out of his system. But when he goes outside, he doesn’t go to chase birds or lounge in the sun like MOST CATS. No, he goes straight for a shrub and eats it. . . then promptly comes in and pukes. So I don’t let him out anymore. BUT then my formerly silent cat MEOWS from the time he gets up to the time he goes to bed. It’s GREAT. I LOVE IT. (I’m about the lose my ever-lovin’ mind. Do they make shock collars for cats?)
But it’s kinda hard to tell this face no.
I love to go outside! And I love to puke! I love to go outside AND puke!
Okay, have a great week! This is my last week before going back to school, so it will go by SOOO fast. I expect to wake up tomorrow and find out it’s Friday.
JEN
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12 Comments so far
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I don’t pay a lot of attention to romance, but I kind of thought Harlequin has had some pretty junky stuff for a long time. Now with them publishing anything remotely clean under the Steeple Hill label, I can only imagine that it doesn’t leave them anything good to publish in their other lines. But then, what do I know about romance?
Bloopers are always my favorite part, too!
Too funny about the romances! Especially since I don’t read them, and trek straight toward your books and suspense. (Interesting blend, no?)
Miller is soooo cute! My cat Doogie (may he rest in peace) ate grass, but it never affected him, and he didn’t complain when he couldn’t get it. Makes you wonder…
Blessings!
I used to work at the library and shelve the Harlequins. They didn’t have names like that, though! I guess we just had your grandma’s old stuff?
Sorry ’bout the whole going back to school thing… I still need to do my summer reading, but my loving teacher made it impossible to find a book. Our school has this list of books we can read, but about 99.99% of them aren’t what my teacher told us to do. She said it had to be a book on the list, near our grade level, and hasn’t been made into a movie. WHAT DECENT BOOK HASN’T BEEN MADE INTO A MOVIE?!?! Me and my cousin looked through the whole list… and (out of about 600) we came up with about 3. One of which started out with a Harlequin type scene. Boy do I love my teachers.. golly gee…
Well… this being comments on your blog and all, I think I can get around to commenting about your blog now! Your cat is adorable! I think with it being so cut, you could get people to pay for it to barf on them!
P.S. I WANT TO READ YOUR BOOK! NOT THE TWILIGHT SERIES!!! YOUR BOOOOOOOOOK! Uhhh… yeah… so, bye.
I can sympathize with you on the cat puke. My 18-year-old cat was indoor/outdoor for the first 12 years of his life, and then I had the nerve to move him to a townhouse development, where he can’t roam free. So I have a little tie-out/leash for him so he can at least get some fresh air. But yeah, he goes straight for the grass. The trick is to leave him out long enough so that he does the puking outside–it’s usually right in the middle of my walkway, but at least it’s not soaked into my carpet!
man those titles are hilarious. and sorry about the puking cat… my cat looks funny right now. he and my dog like to play and my dog accidently pulled some hair off the top of his head. (like a huge chunk..) my poor cat. but he still continues to play with the dog. so i guess he is secure in his looks.
i start school the 11th. i am actually excited. i am going to a new school (the first year that it is opened) and since they dont let seniors in the first year. i will be the top class (two years in a row and the first to graduating class) !! so i am happy.
The book titles are hysterical. You should come to our library if you want clean fiction. They don’t have anything published after the year 1801.
Debbie
Tim, if you don’t know anything about romance then maybe the Harlequins we found are just the thing you need to brush up. If you ever become a millionaire, sheik, or cowboy, you will need to know these things.
Wow, thanks for all the cat-puking sympathy. I feel much better.
I think there are still some “normal” Harlequins out there. I totally used to read those! I love a quick read. (Which is NOT the 800 page Breaking Dawn book that I’ve YET to really start)
Good luck at your new school, Dani! I’m glad you’re excited. Hopefully the rest of us can get excited soon too. Except for Julia–who has a lot of reading to do.
And Debbie, sorry about your library. But I’m sure there’s lots to learn in those books–like stuff about wagon trains. And how to conserve your candle light. And …okay, no. That’s tragic. I hope things turn around.
I love school so much I have been back since July 24th. And by the by…how do you have the energy to be out running around at mid-night?
umm i just noticed your hair!! it’s short!! what happened?? i just remembered your status on facebook a few nights ago.. something about “its only hair, its only hair” ???
ps: harlequin is horrible.. whats worse is that there’s a “religious” version similiar to those!!!! *gag*