Students Are Funny. Sometimes.

Happy Mid-Week! Did anyone see Quantum of Solace last weekend? What is up with that name? It sounds like the name of a casket or something. And here we have the quantum of solace, a lovely stainless number with silk powder blue interior…

So students can be entertaining at times. A few weeks ago one of my kids bit into a chocolate Pop-Tart and got a worm. Not even kidding. Had I not been there, I wouldn’t have believed it. It was disgusting…but funny. Those are on recall, by the way. I told her she should have saved the worm and the package, sent them in, and we could have all gotten free (non chocolate) Pop-Tarts!

I thought I’d share my semester’s worth of student comments.

Me: If you could have any super power, what would it be?
Ninth Grade Student: The power to grow a beard really fast.

Me: If you could have any super power, what would it be?
Student: The ability to turn into a liger and cook hamburgers with my tail.

Student’s attention getter from a speech: There is only one thing better than judging a Jessica Alba lookalike contest…and that’s eating homemade brownies.

Me: What is one thing you’d change about yourself?
Student: I’d have claws.

Me: If you could be any animal, what would you be?

Student 1: A Cheagle. A cheetah-eagle. I’d be able to fly and be really fast.
Student 2: A gitigon. A love child of a dragon, tiger, and lion. It breathes fire and runs fast.
Student 3: A mole. . .cause it rhymes with my name. Joel.
Student 4: What about you, Ms. Jones?
Me: I’d want to be a squirrelevangelist. I would travel the world, teaching all the other squirrels about looking both ways before crossing the street.

Me: What were you for Halloween?
Student: An Army person. I was supposed to be GI Jane, but I forgot my gun at school.

Me: What was your scariest moment?
Student: In fifth grade, I was throwing rocks at a house under construction. I broke a window and just ran. I thought they’d take me to juvie.

Student working on a “create your own country project” :  How do you spell slutty?
Me: What? I would never spell that out for you. How inappropriate.
Students: We want to use it.
Me: I don’t know if you –okay. S-l-u-t-t-y.
Students: We said SLEDDY, as in a sled.
Me: I knew that.

Moi: You are on death row for too much texting at school. What is your last meal?
Student 1: McDonalds–I’d get their Monopoly “Get Out of Jail” card.
Student 2: Ramen noodles and a ring pop.
Student 3: Three soft tacos and a juice box.

Me: What is your favorite possession?
Student: My ring. My boyfriend gave it to me for our weekaversary.

Me: Okay, Student, so why do you strongly agree that the school should have uniforms?
Student: Uniforms? Oh. I thought you said unicorns.

See, if you were a teacher you could have this level of entertainment daily. It’s so fun! Nonstop fun! In fact, it’s so much zany fun, I will cry all next week when I am on Thanksgiving break.

Have a good rest of the week.


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8 Comments so far

  1. Heather November 19th, 2008 10:45 am

    So my good “teacher story” of the week is that a third graders in the class next door to me walked in Monday morning with a half of a deer leg. Apparently her daddy went hunting and killed a deer, so instead of an apple, she brought a deer hoof to her teacher for a “Happy Monday” gift! :) WOW!!! Then, the same teacher had one student come in yesterday showing off the 10 staples he had gotten in his head…yeah, there’s never a dull moment in teaching.

  2. Rhonda November 19th, 2008 1:21 pm

    I LOVE these. You have very funny students. This blog is SO entertaining. Turned my blah Wednesday into a fun day!!

  3. Gab November 19th, 2008 6:05 pm

    Ahh…the talent wind blows in once again! :]

  4. jenny b. jones November 19th, 2008 6:09 pm

    I would seriously take the rest of the day off if a student brought me a deer leg.

    Thanks, Rhonda. Anything’s better than writing boring papers… ; )

    Gab, it was so good to see the talent wind blow through here! And good to hear from you!

  5. Rhonda November 19th, 2008 6:16 pm

    I wasn’t going to comment on the deer leg, but I cannot imagine getting through that day.

  6. Edge November 20th, 2008 11:50 am

    Heh heh. I just read Act 1 of Hamlet, which talks about “sledded Poles”. What timing!

  7. Jess November 20th, 2008 3:21 pm

    haha thanks for the entertaining blog!!

  8. Christa Allan November 20th, 2008 9:35 pm

    so much fun, so little pay. . .

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