Random Rants
1. So in case you were worried about American Idol’s runner up, Adam, fear not. He’s obviously resurfaced to try again in Britain.
2. I feel badly for Mike Tyson and the death of his four-year-old daughter. Literally death by treadmill.
3. Jon and Kate say they are “mad at the media.” Jon and Kate, you ARE the media. Shut up and pull your blinds.
4. Looking at Demi Moore has never made me feel good about myself. Until NOW.
5. AT&T may have rigged Kris’s win on American Idol? They obviously got a cut of the lifetime free cheese dip.
6. THIS YA author always has the best book titles. I have title envy.
7. Kanye West, who has said he’s a “proud non-reader” is about to become a published children’s book author. If it doesn’t win a Caldecott will he storm off a stage and cuss little kids out?
8. I have one week and one day left of school, and I’m already transitioning into “stay up late because it’s summer” mode. It make me a little out of it in the mornings. But not this out of it:
9. Buffy the Vampire Slayer may return…but no Sarah Michelle Gellar, no Whedon, and no returning supporting cast? That idea needs a stake to the heart.
10. Mel Gibson is not yet divorced and his GF is preggo. Just think, if he left girlfriend for Kate Gosselin, together they’d have 16 kids! This begs for a Lethal Weapon joke…
11. Anyone else have a rant? ; )
So my kids have been giving their final speech of the semester. It’s worth 20 percent of their grade, so it’s a huge big deal. To me.
This is an informative speech, and they could pick between speaking on a famous person or a dream vacation spot. I’ve learned a few things during their speeches. All this time…I didn’t know Al Capone was Scarface. I know there’s no excuse for that. But the only thing with mobsters I’ve ever seen is Guys and Dolls. So I never got the big fear of Capone and the mob. You could do worse than being offed by a guy who will sing and tap over your body. Did you know Capone died of cardiac arrest, but it was believed to be a complication from…syphilis? Al Capone…taken down by VD. That’s not the mob boss I want to work for.
I also found out that Marilyn Manson’s name is derived from a combo of Charles Manson and Marilyn Monroe. AND Marilyn Manson went to a Christian school until his junior year. . .yikes.
I’ve heard some funny things during speeches so far.
(A student speaking on infomerical king Billy Mays) “Why is he an important person? Because he doesn’t beat up hookers like the creepy Sham-Wow guy.”
“In Moscow they have the Alexander Garden. I don’t know why it’s called that. Probably after someone named Alexander.”
“London had Charles Dickens. He wrote a bunch of books and stuff. It also had Isaac Newton. He defied laws of gravity and whatnot.”
“Some interesting things to do in London include…an IMAX.”
“Gothic style is like huge, huge bigness.”
And then there was the student today who spoke about a place called Hagooie. For three minutes we heard all about the cool things to see and do in Hagooie.I thought, “What is this, the homeland of Spaghettios?” Towards the end, it was finally mentioned that this location was in the Netherlands. “How do you spell that?” I asked when he was done. He checks his notecards. “H-A-G-U-E. Hagooie.”
After a student knocked it out of the park and gave the best speech he’s ever given, I said, “My gosh! Great speech, Michael.”
To which another student replies, “It needed more cowbell.”
That pretty much made my week.
Have a great day!
JEN
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15 Comments so far
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LOL, I love that video of the poor little guy, I saw it yesterday. “Rawwrrrr!”
I am now going to have to use the word “Hagooie” somehow. I’m not sure, but I’ll find a way.
And your hair looks great, btw! I almost didn’t recognize you.
You have AWESOME students.
No New Buffy! that’s verging on Whedon blasphemy.
btw your book has made me chuckle more than looks sane in public places.
it doesn’t surprise me at all the Kanye West cant read.
happy week!
JENNY B. JONES GOT TWITTER! *Does Snoopy Dance*. I’ve been looking for you on Twitter for forever and just noticed your twitter badge today.
I’m a DebraWeiss on there. The girl with the picture of the converse.
Debbie
“H-A-G-U-E. Hagooie.” LOL! That student should totally get an A. (And I cracked up over the speech on Billy Mays. My older brother was talking about that just a week ago.)
Awesome new picture!
Hehe. This post pretty much just made my day.
And OMG, you iz on Twitter? How long have I been in the dark? Maybe I’m as out of it as that kid:p
I have a rant!
School’s almost out. Which is great and all but that means I don’t have access to a computer because mine crashed which is finger-lickin-dumb. I don’t know how I’m gonna live Jenny. I just don’t know.
HA! That video with the kid! It’s genius. That dad should get a medal or a trophy or something.
That Sham-Wow guy is creepy. But Billy Mays isn’t exactly Mr.Tall, Dark and Handsome either. OHHH speaking of which WHAT IS SHAM-WOW DUDE’S NAME??????????
And finally, Buffy. Oh my gosh. I <3 Buffy but without Sarah Michelle Gellar? It’s nothing. Angel was an amazing show but that’s cause it still had Angel and Cordelia. And now they are just going to ruin the memory of Buffy. What IS this world coming to?
Hey, Melodie, you must find a way to work Hagooie into a conversation. Thanks for the hair compliments. I had a good photographer. ; )
Bethany, I really do have good students. They’ve been especially entertaining for me this semester. Zero discipline problems. Couldn’t ask for more.
Colene, TOTAL Whedon blasphemy. I guess the people in charge are the ones who brought us the original Buffy movie. (The what? There’s only ONE Buffy!)
Sarah, you don’t know about Twitter because I joined…and pretty much have let it sit there and rot. I think I post like 2x a week. It’s weird for me to not like something that would keep me online longer. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.
Tabitha, libraries! They have free computer access! Angel and Cordelia…I miss them so.
Debbie, while i LOVE my new Twitter logo (thanks to the cool folk at PulsePoint Design), I do not love Twitter. I’m a Twitter flunky. Give me Facebook any day!
Hannah, I had to ask the student about the ShamWow guy. “Um, he got arrested for doing WHAT? And HOW do you know this…?”
LOL @ Hagooie!
You have much better covers than that other YA chick.
And, as a fan of the original Buffy (yes, the movie, not the show), I’m interested to see what they’ll do with it. The original Buffy had some amazing wit that I hope to see repeated. But if they butcher it, I’ll be right with you saying, “Excuse much, rude or anything.”
So…you caved in to Twitter! About time!
Your new pic is so pretty! Now for my rant: I am annoyed that, in effort to makeup for not showing Project Runway, Bravo has enlisted a show that is a total PR rip. Issac Mizrahi is a doll, but he is not Tim Gunn. I need Tim Gunn. The designers aren’t as interesting and the stuff they make isn’t as cool. I think Project Runway is airing in August, on a different channel, so I’m not too sad. But still.
I’m not going to rant (I do that too much as it is), but I want to say I LOVE the phrase “finger-lickin-dumb.” Thanks Tabitha! I’m going to work that in every chance I get. Someone cuts me off in traffic, “You are finger-lickin-dumb!” That is too funny.
At school I have wayyyy too many chances to use something like finger-lickin-dumb. Probably not good that I now know that term.
Natalie, so sorry for your temporary loss of Tim Gunn. Isaac does not have Tim’s panache and sophistication. May the two of you be reunited soon.
Christa, are you on Twitter? I haven’t had time to look for anyone! Or post…or tweet…or DM…or reply…or whatever.
Thanks, Danica. They did do a fabulous job with the So Not Happening cover. Can’t go wrong with a pig. Hope you and your new computer have learned to get along!
#9 makes me maddest. Followed in close second by #7.
Jocelyn, you watched Buffy? I would have NEVER guessed!