And NOW we’ve lost Billy Mays? WHAT is this world coming to? Who will inherit the “Best Infomercial Guy” crown now? Can’t be that Sham Wow guy because nobody’s gonna buy OxyClean from a prostitute beating perv. Unless it’s really on sale.

I don’t know why this commercial cracks me up, but it does. I laugh every time at the time sheet guy.

Did you know Rhode Island might shorten its name? When I first read that headline, I thought we were gonna have to call it Rhode or maybe R. Sometimes dropping a last name helps–like Madonna or Cher. But apparently this ministate is officially called State of Rhode Island and Providence Plantations. WHO knew? I didn’t. The people who want it changed say that the word plantation reminds America that Rhode Island had slaves– on plantations. Are they seriously using tax dollars and House/Senate money to discuss this? Rhode Island, I hate to break it to you, but nobody thinks of you when they think slavery. And I don’t even think my grandma’s old Encyclopedias (big heavy books of multiple volumes that contained Google-like information and were very expensive, eventually stinky, and hard to sell at garage sales) refers to RI as State of Rhode Island Blah Blah Plantation Etc.  We have pop stars and commercial stars dropping like flies here. These are crazy times, and America needs you to focus on things that count.  Like a national holiday honoring Ed McMahon in which we go to work in sweats so we can comfortably ponder his contributions to this world.

So over my vacation to Ireland and Scotland, I read The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society. It really wasn’t my type of book. I mean, Fabio was nowhere on the cover, so I had no assurance there would be romance and a big kissy payoff. But I LOVED this book. The first half was good. . .but the second half was awesome. It’s a quick read–written in letters, which also usually doesn’t thrill me. About 20 characters chime in, and I loved every one of them. Plus I learned something about the German occupation. Those sneaky authors–sliding in a little history. It’s just such a clever, magical book that makes you want to put down your own pen and never write again for lack of worthiness. During the German occupation, “Elizabeth” and other Guernsey folk get caught out past curfew. So Elizabeth tells the soldiers they’re just coming home from their book club. Then to carry off the lie, they all have to start a book club, with everyone getting a book and talking about it. It is so genius to see how the war affects their lives, how this character Elizabeth affects their lives, and how each person’s book selection affects them. I’m tearing up now just thinking about it–this book will GET you. It’s a beautiful message on the power of kinship in hard times, the broad definition of family, and the power of books.

Mary Ann Shaffer wanted to write this book on what she had learned about the actual island of Guernsey, but toward the end of the project, she got too sick to continue. So her niece, an author, helped her finish. Mary Ann passed away, but not before knowing that her book would be published and that it was expected to be a big, big deal.  I love Amazon’s author spotlight with the niece. You can see it HERE.  I love how articulate the author is about the book. Whenever I’m asked about my books, I’m always like, “Um…it’s about a girl…and she has problems…and there’s a boy…he has two legs.”  Really profound. I love to talk about other people’s books though!

Anyway, Guernsey was so good. I finished the book in the Scotland airport, and two different times I was wiping away tears and feeling like a TOTAL sappy cow. And there’s this character in the book that I just want to be when I grow up. Or tomorrow. I’d take tomorrow. It’s also one of those books that when people see the cover, they will stop you and expect you to talk to them about it. It’s a total conversation starter. People stopped me in the Shannon, Ireland airport to talk about it. I love that. Plus, it’s a beautiful cover. It’s weeks later, and I still can’t stop thinking about this book. THAT’S a sign of a good book. And I don’t mean I’m still thinking about it in the icky sense like when I read the first half of Kite Runner and was scarred for life and wanted to gouge out my own eyeballs. Or when I had to read this “great novel” in college called Lolita and I wanted to barf on my professor. Not like that at all!

So I’m giving away a copy of The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society! Because I think everyone should read it. And then we can ALLL want to be this one particular character in the book. (But I have first dibs.) To win, all you have to do is leave a comment in answer to this question:  What is one thing you are looking forward to this summer? Mine is just having time off. Which I’m wasting. Because I’m a time off waster. Someone told me today not to feel guilty about “doing nothing” because in a few months when I was writing/teaching/deadline stressed, I could think on my happy days of nothingness. And it’s true. Pondering nothing always perks me up. You have from now until this Thursday evening to to leave your comment to win the book. The new proud owner of The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society will be announced Friday.

Last night I went to my church’s fireworks show. This is our second year to have them, and they do an awesome job.

My camera does not do an awesome job. I like how it takes a simple image of pretty fireworks. . .

And makes it look like Armageddon. . .plus a few sparklers.

It’s the end of the world. . .and it’s pink and smells like bottle rockets.

We have three giant crosses on our church grounds, so it’s cool to see the fireworks against that backdrop.
Because nothing says we love Jesus like explosives.

I was sitting there on the church grounds with the 1000s of other people (and my mom and aunt), and I noticed the people behind us screaming and laughing. They were getting drenched, but I had no idea where the water was coming from. Then about fifteen seconds later…the water hit us. I totally got HOSED. Seems the church forgot to turn their sprinklers off. And these are not your typical sprinklers. These are like put out a burning building sprinklers. Water the Sahara sprinklers. Take out small children and elderly sprinklers. Ruin a girl’s Chi’d hair sprinklers. . .

Side note: A friend just emailed me from Gulf Shores and sent this picture with the following caption…

“Obviously we aren’t going dolphin watching tonight.” (Speaking of Armageddon… That looks straight from the movie.)

Don’t forget to leave a comment between now and Thursday evening (cutoff time somewhere between Charlie Gibson and Letterman) to be entered to win Guernsey. You do not want to miss this book. Also stay tuned for zany trip pics and an interview with awesome author Kathleen Fuller, where I ask her what is the DEAL with all these Amish books. You won’t want to miss it.

See you Wednesday!

JEN

23 comments

Congrats to Catrina!! You’ve won a free copy of Breaking Up Is Hard To Do. Just email me with your home addy, and we’ll get that to you.

Can you believe Thursday? The loss of Farrah (expected) was sad, BUT the death of Michael Jackson? Unreal. I held a constant vigil on the couch with a bowl of cereal (okay, two), my laptop, and CNN. Some really weird reports were coming out last night. One reporter said Michael was 100 lbs. Can I be honest and tell you I had mean thoughts about Michael when I heard that? 100 pounds…   And a family spokesperson went off script and said Jackson had a long-time problem with prescription drugs, and the family had tried to get him away from his “inner circle.” Britney knows how that feels.

Facebook lit up during the Michael Jackson is he/isn’t he hours. You know what drives me nuts? People whose first response is something like, “If only he had known Jesus” or “Now he’ll see how he wasted his life.”  THIS is why Christians get a bad name–because of the few. Yes, I hope he was saved too. Yes, Michael Jackson had a kookie life and was more than likely a pedo. BUT we don’t know that. And I don’t recall Christ spitting on any graves in the Bible. I hope when it’s my time, I get mercy from those I leave behind. And not, “I hear she could eat her body weight in Fruit Loops.”  “She should’ve read Nora Roberts less and her Bible more.”   “She will not be known for good flossing habits.” Even now people on FB are posting excerpts of things online that prove/disprove Jackson’s lack of salvation with a Three Snaps In Z Formation-Uh-Huh tone.  Look, that ship has gone into the glittery gloved night. Go harass love on someone else.  People who think every sermon is about someone else…

As I watched hours of CNN, E!, ABC News, etc., I was struck by the young Michael Jackson versus the older. Larry King said a young Michael Jackson stole interviews. He said an adult MJ was “not a good interview.” Makes you wonder what happened. You can see a different person in the younger years. He was more masculine at 12 than he was at 42. I really think there’s something chemical to it. A weird hormone imbalance at puberty? I dunno. I think it’s more than just a guy warped by being in the public eye all his life. (But on the very good chance I’m wrong, BIG RED FLAG to the Jon and Kate kids!)  I think fame can change you. . .but not THAT much. Fame doesn’t alter your estrogen levels.

And on a tacky note, what a day to die if you’re NOT Michael Jackson. Sorry, Farrah. You got robbed. Larry King said, “We had a whole show dedicated to Farrah, but now? There’s no way.”  Sucky poo.

If you grew up in the 80s (and I might’ve. . .), Michael Jackson was a part of your life. My BFF in early elementary had a Michael Jackson sleeping bag. I did not, and I did go through a brief period of unbridled jealousy. When I was in the fourth grade (I think?), my class sang “We Are the World” in some sort of ceremony honoring hometown senior citizens. Or some group. Former cafeteria ladies? Anyway, it’s still a great song. I watched it Thursday night and had fun picking out all the singers. Kenny Rogers is young, Bruce Springsteen’s entry is hilarious, and Cyndi Lauper is still sheer awesomeness.

But moving on. My Thursday was still great. I babysat my 8 year old nephew and three-and-a-half year old niece. When I got to my brother’s house, my niece woke up, came in the kitchen, and said, “Are you my Jenny?” There can be only one answer to that sweet question.

We watched part of Ghostbusters II, which I want to finish eventually because I did not remember how funny it was. My niece wanted me to see how she could watch the movie.

My niece glanced at me and said, “You could stand on your head too.”  Of course, I didn’t want to show off and intimidate the child, so I didn’t. Only reason.

My nephew in the car. Anyone see any evidence he’s related to me?

And then we went to Chick-fil-A for lunch. I thought the kids would be entertained with the indoor play thingie for a while, but they really weren’t.

Grandma’s pool is up for the season, and they went to bed last night with visions of sunscreen and goggles dancing in their heads. So they both couldn’t wait to haul it out of Chick-Fil-A. My niece got so excited she did not make it to the bathroom in time. Which she had to announce to the entire restaurant. THREE TIMES. As I’m quickly steering her to the bathroom, every time I’d say “Shhh!” she’d take that as a cue to say it louder. Even the hand to the mouth proved pointless.

Here’s my niece probably at the moment she realized she needed to go to the bathroom.

“Oops…Oh, well. I’ll just slide a few more minutes.”

“Hey, I have a secret!”

After two bites of chicken nuggets, we went to my mom’s to swim. Or I went to sit. Four hours. In 98 degree weather. The heat did not even faze these two.

Aren’t they cute? They are such good kids. (Minus the 15 minute scrub down in the bathroom for one.) I had a great time hanging out with them.

Conversation with my nephew: I don’t know where I want me go to college.
Me: You have a long time to decide.
Nephew: I want to be a Red Raider.
Sports Idiot Aunt: Where’s that.
Nephew: Boston. I want to play football for them.
Niece: Me too.

Nephew: Why do girls have whiskers on their legs?

Nephew: Are your car windows tinted?
Me: No.
Nephew: Why?
Me: Because I’m not cool.
10 minutes later…
Nephew: So none of these windows are tinted?
Me: No. So don’t pick your nose.

Niece when I was bathing her in sunscreen. “Rubby, rubby, dubby, scrubby. . .”

I hope you have a great weekend. Come back Monday for crazy trip pics, and another guest author interview and giveaway. It’s a summer of book givin!

Billie Jean is also not my lovah,

JEN

9 comments

Listening to Pandora and blogging. I love Pandora radio. Except no matter how many times I say “I don’t like it,” they slip in Jack Johnson and Coldplay. I know I’m alone in this, but I can’t stand either one. Especially Johnson. Please don’t make voodoo dolls in my image.

Today was my first day at home on summer vacation. I had no idea what to do with myself…so I did nothing. I napped. And Facebooked. I did get a lot of great feedback about this cover today:

There’s still time to chime in. Like it? Dislike it? Offended by cow tongue? For every comment, you’ll be entered into a drawing to win Breaking Up Is Hard to Do. Last day to enter is Thursday at 8pm CT. The winner will be announced on Friday’s blog. Assuming I have time to write one–with all my napping and Facebooking and all.

So Jon and Kate. SIGH. I mean SERIOUSLY? Lived apart for two years? Jon’s “excited?” Kate says she has to do this for the kids? Can you imagine spending your whole life in front of cameras? How jacked up would you be if you were the star your entire life? Those kids need to be in the real world and get some real perspective. TLC has put the show on a temporary break. Good. I’ve said this before, but. . .the Duggar’s do not have these problems. Maybe Jon and Kate need more God, more hairspray.

Jason Mraz is on Pandora right now. I love him. I could write sonnets for him. His music is awesome. So unappreciated in the music industry. Here’s the ultra cool song playing:

Before I jump into my trip pics (there are only 1200 of them…), I wanted to finish showing off my Wal-Mart Shareholder meeting photos. I think these pictures become cooler when reminded I got up at four a.m. for this event. FOUR A.M. As in the time I’m usually awake before a trip because I’m not through packing.

Here’s Michael Jordan (with his Hanes covered up).

I love this picture because he’s with a Wal-Mart pwerhouse big wig who came UNDONE upon meeting the guy. She was a giggley school girl. It was really cute. You could TELL she was a huge fan, and it was quite a moment to be talking to be standing next to him, let alone talking to him.

Then there was Kris Allen.

He was good. Sang that goofy AI song that no one including his mother likes. Sang Heartless by Kanye. He talked about how important Wal-Mart was to Arkansas. This is true. When I lived in his town of Conway, Wal-Mart was not just where you got your toilet paper. It was where you hung out. There was one theater and an El Chico there at the time. Wal-Mart was my entertainment when we had seen everything at the two-plex. Plus a poor college girl can always scrounge up some money for a new nail polish. Or at least a candy bar.

Smoky Robinson sang a few songs. I love Motown, but. . .Smoky probably needs to retire. His voice isn’t what it used to be. Neither should he be in shiny, tight pants. I’m still working on getting that image out of my head. Kris Allen came back out and sand with him, and that was pretty good.

I couldn’t get a clear shot of Smoky’s tight pants, but don’t think I didn’t try. I did. I really put my heart into it, but nothing. The pic above does not do the inappropriateness justice.

This is the point I always tune out.

“And. . . I’m done. Time for more free donuts.”

I don’t mind hearing about business, but when they pull out the charts and graphs, my brain shudders.
Cannot. Handle. Charts.
Graphs. Should. Be. Wiped. Off. Planet.

But Wal-Mart seems to be taking good care of my one solitary share, so until next year, I will leave it in their capable hands. Oh, and the angry nuns were no-shows AGAIN. The people who fight for the Equal Opportunity definition to include the transgender community got voted down again. Maybe the nuns were home praying for them.

It is really hot in Arkansas. Like 96-102 degrees. What’s your weather like? We have no rain in sight, and I’m really wanting a nice rainstorm to nap work by. Plus I’m SICK of watering my yard. I got this tiny patch of sod in a new sideyard, and the fix-it guy said it would be low maintenance. Um, watering for like an hour a day? Not low maintenance. I meant throw some gravel out and let’s be done with it. Maybe some astroturf?

So when I got back from my trip, I had some apples that had turned mushy. I do not eat mushy apples. (I also don’t eat ripe bananas. They make me gag, and then I usually do some projectile spitting. It’s attractive.) A friend of mine always throws his apples out his back yard because we live around wildlife. So that’s what I did. And within ten minutes I had deer in my backyard! It was like they were hiding and waiting for a snack.

I think after they ate my apples, they went to my neighbors and ate their flowers. That’s what they get for trying to outdo me with their fancy landscaping anyway. They should stick with dead ferns like me. One on each side of the front door. Lovely.

Another Jason Mraz song is on! I like this one too.

And subtitles in case you want to work on your reading skills and sing along!

So I read A Bride in the Bargain. I like the cover. Though it reminds me of Miss Havisham from Great Expectations. A woman I teach with has a life size Miss Havisham doll she’d set out every year when her classes read that book. It kinda creeped me out. The doll got lost when we all moved to a new building. I wasn’t sad. But anyway, this is not Miss H on the cover, but actually the author’s daughter, so that’s cool and totally UNcreepy! It’s about a young woman who goes to Seattle thinking she’s being hired as a cook, but she’s actually being tricked into becoming a wife for hire. I guess (true story) back in the mid 180os the women were scarce in the the Seattle, so a man came up with a scheme to lure young widows and orphans to all the single men. I didn’t know about this moment in history, so that part was interesting. Love when I learn about history when reading a book.  You can read the synopsis and sample chapter after my signature.

Have a great rest of the week. Stay cool.

JEN

This week, the
Christian Fiction Blog Alliance
is introducing
A Bride In The Bargain
Bethany House (June 1, 2009)
by
Deeanne Gist

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Deeanne Gist, the bestselling author of A Bride Most Begrudging and The Measure of a Lady, has a background in education and journalism. Her credits include People magazine, Parents, and Parenting. With a line of parenting products called “I Did It!® Productions” and a degree from Texas A&M, she continues her writing and speaking. She and her family live in Houston, Texas.

Since the debut of those novels, her very original, very fun romances have rocketed up the bestseller lists and captured readers everywhere. Add to this two consecutive Christy Awards, two RITA nominations, rave reviews, and a growing loyal fan base, and you’ve got one recipe for success.

ABOUT THE BOOK

The Wedding Is All Planned…
Someone Just Needs to Tell the Bride
In 1860s Seattle, redwoods were plentiful but women scarce. Yet a man with a wife could secure 640 acres of timberland for free.

Joe Denton doesn’t have a wife, though. His died before she could follow him to Seattle and now the local judge is threatening to take away his claim. In desperation, he buys himself a Mercer bride–one of the eastern widows and orphans brought to the Territory by entrepreneur Asa Mercer.

Anna Ivey’s journey west with Mercer is an escape from the aftermath of the Civil War. She signed on to become a cook–not a bride. When she’s handed over to Denton, her stubborn refusal to wed jeopardizes his land. With only a few months before he loses all he holds dear, can he convince this provoking, but beguiling, easterner to become his lawfully wedded wife?

If you would like to read the first chapter of A Bride In The Bargain, go HERE

13 comments

Today we have a book winner and a new contest. And a million other random things.

First of all, thanks so much to Natalie Lloyd for dropping by the blog in my absence. See what I mean–she’s a lot of fun. And speaking of Lloyd and crazy fun, Missa is the winner of Natalie’s book Paperdoll. Missa just email me from the contact me page and gimme yo mailing addy, and Natalie will get that book to you! I have a feeling she’s better at getting to the post office than someone else I know…

Here’s a fun dilemma. We would like your feedback on the cover for the next A Charmed Life book, I’m So Sure.

Here’s a quick blurb:

First, her family is chosen for a reality TV show, then she’s forced to get a part-time job at a feminine hygiene plant. Bella tries to press STOP before she totally loses her cool.

Bella Kirkwood is finally situated in her new hometown, but she’s not ready for the whirlwind of randomness that takes place next. When her stepdad enters a new wrestling reality show, Bella is pulled along for the ride as her life goes on display for all the world to see. When the cameras roll, Bella must solve a prom-queen mystery, deal with her returning ex-boyfriend, and keep her cool as she works alongside the hot but irritating newspaper editor Luke Sullivan.

Who needs TV when you’re living the charmed life?

Just to refresh, here’s the cover of So Not Happening, so you can compare the two. We don’t want them to look like they’re not related, but they don’t have to be identical twins either.

So what do you think of the cover for I’m So Sure? Would the cover make you pick it up? The cow–thumbs up or thumbs down? Let me know what you truly, honestly, totally think and…you’ll be in the running for for our next book giveaway!!! To win a copy of the YA book Breaking Up is Hard to Do, just leave a comment telling us what the sight of the new book cover does for you. I’ll talk more about the Breaking Up book later in the post.

And here’s another freebie book opportunity! Sarah at “I Think Therefore I Blog” interviewed me and is giving away So Not Happening.  Sarah is a cool girl who is funny and also a good writer! Her blog is fun to check out, and her interview questions? Honestly, the best I’ve ever had. It was a fun Q & A, and it was a great opportunity to talk about some stuff that was truly on my mind. (Like setting the record straight on my Bella and Twilight‘s Bella.) You can read the interview and get your name in the hat for the book HERE. Act quickly–the contest is over soon.

Speaking of Sarah, she has a funny YouTube clip on her blog that I had found as well! Are you ready for T-Swizzle?

Here’s another song I’m digging lately. Video not so hot–but the song is too catchy.

Is that not weirdly awesome?

Have you seen Buffy versus Edward? It’s a bit long (boring), but I love the girl power concept AND I strongly recommend minute 3:52 if you’ve seen the movie. Buffy is no doormat and does not let creepy vamp boys just watch her sleep. I like that message because I also take a strong stand against girls letting creepy vamp boys watch them sleep. Just say no. With a pointy stake.

I saw The Proposal last night. I liked it a lot. Didn’t love it–it seemed to be missing about 20 minutes of story to be perfect and not rushed, but still, it was good. And there were a few parts, I was laughing so hard, I got embarrassed. I’m talking laughed ’til I couldn’t breathe. They were the inappropriate parts, of course. But Ryan Reynolds–that guy is a genius at comedy and timing. Seriously. He MADE the movie. He’s come a long way from Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place. And that place he’s come to? The land of amazingness.

Speaking of movies, another RomCom I liked was New in Town. I got to see it again on my flight to Ireland. I LOVE Siobhan Fallon, who is an awesome character actress and plays Blanche Gunderson. I also love this interview with her where she applauds the producers of the movie for doing a film with faith-filled characters who aren’t total morons. Now I just like her even more.

I recently read Breaking Up Is Hard to Do by Annie Dayton and May Vanderbilt, who are fairly new to the YA world. I was impressed with the book. Cute cover. Real characters. They talk like teens, which I appreciated. I had a few favorite (not exact) lines:

1. “They live their lives in the spaces between chaos and crisis.”

2. “Just look at how many famines and wars have been stopped by people taking a little time out of their day to sit around and talk about their feelings. I’ve absolutely lost count .”

3. (On whether or not a fish is a guy or girl) “He really looks like a guy. The fish swims to the far side of the bag and ignores me. Okay, he’s definitely a dude.”

A cute book worth checking out. If you’re interested, you can hear an interview with the authors HERE. You can also read the synopsis and sample chapter below my sign-off. And of course if you give me some much needed feedback on the book cover, you might possibly get your own copy of Breaking Up is Hard to Do. I’m looking forward to hearing your opinions. And by the way, please don’t compare the cover of I’m So Sure to THIS BOOK because we will never achieve that level of greatness. That’s like a Rembrandt of a cover. A Monet.

Crazy random pictures (there might be a crack shot), more about my trip (men in kilts?), and more book giveaways coming soon. Stay tuned.

Glad to be back home and thanks so much for keeping the blog comments going. I loved reading them when I got back. I don’t care what your mothers say about you, you guys the best.

JEN

This week, the
Christian Fiction Blog Alliance
is introducing
Breaking Up Is Hard To Do
FaithWords (April 16, 2009)
by
Anne Dayton & May Vanderbilt

ABOUT THE AUTHORS:

ANNE DAYTON graduated from Princeton University and is earning her master’s degree in English literature at New York University. She works for a New York publishing company and lives in Brooklyn.

MAY VANDERBILT graduated from Baylor University and went on to earn a master’s degree in fiction from Johns Hopkins University. She lives in San Francisco, where she writes about food, fashion, and nightlife in the Bay Area.

Together, the two women are the authors of Miracle Girls

ABOUT THE BOOK

Ana, Christine, Riley, and Zoe have grown closer than ever over the past few months, but summer is over and it’s time to put their friendship to the test.
It’s been a little over a year since Christine Lee’s mom passed away in a tragic car accident. Now her dad is engaged to Candace–”The Bimbo”–and Christine couldn’t be less thrilled. When her attitude starts to take a toll on her schoolwork, the administration forces her to attend counseling sessions. At least she gets to skip gym class!
But with her father’s wedding inching closer, Christine is growing even more bitter. To make matters worse, the Miracle Girls are beginning to drift apart. Christine’s anger and the pressures of high school threaten to break the girls up when they need each other the most. Will they find a way to join together to help Christine come to terms with her mother’s death . . . and her father’s remarriage?

If you would like to read the first chapter of Breaking Up Is Hard To Do, go HERE

13 comments

I know you’re on the edge of your seat for more quotes from my kids. In fact, the local university just called me and said they’d had a ton of requests for applications to their teaching program. It’s true. Teaching is awesome. And if you become one, you can be entertained every hour of every day at school. You’ll never have a bad day. It’s all giggles and zombie references. If these quotes don’t persuade you to educate our youth, then clearly nothing is going to get through to your hard heart.

Me: Who is a famous person you’d like to meet?
Student 1: Mr. T. He eats babies.
Student 2: Nostradamus. He’s smart–in a creepy way.

Me: It’s the last day of your life. What do you do?
Student 1: Repent. . .that would take the first 20 hours.

Me: What would you do if you were guaranteed success?
Student 1: Take over the world. That seems fun.
Student 2: Become a benevolent dictator. In Peru.
Me: Why Peru?
Student 2: Because I like llamas.

Me: What are three things you’re good at?
Student 1: Driving, backpacking, and shooting random things.
Student 2: Kissing.
Me: Ew.

Me: What’s a movie you’d watch over and over?
Student 1: Final Destination.
Me: Why?
Student 1: People get killed. I love it.
Student 2: Labyrinth. I love that movie. Evne though David Bowie is kind of a pedo.

Me: What is something you’re striving to become?
Student 1: Dictator of Togo.

Me: What are you doing on Spring Break?
Student 1: Burn stuff.
Me: Bird stuff?
Student 1: BURN stuff.
Me: Oh, I thought you said bird stuff.
Student 2: Like pooping on statues?

Me: Pick a number between one and 100.
Student: 5.9

Me: You’re going into the witness protection program. You can only take three things with you. What are they?
Student 1: Alicia Keyes.
Student 2: Firearms, 50 rounds of ammo, cleaning kit, secondary weapon, knife, flashlight, signaling mirror, full quart canteen, bedroll, hiking boots, daily rations, advanced medical kit, ten emergency flares ,and five fire extinguishers.
Me: You can’t take all that.
Student 2: It’s okay. I have a donkey to carry it.

Have a great day!!! Sorry for the super short blog. I’m recovering from my jot to Ireland and Scotland. The kilts were so distracting, I just couldn’t think of anything else to write. Can’t wait to share more Wal-Mart Shareholder pics of famous celebs and tell you all about my trip such as my usual packing disaster (crying, sobbing, avoidance in the form of late night lawn mowing), the castles (Mom, I’d like one for Christmas, please), Nessie (I was feeling lucky…), flight anxiety (do they make drugs for this yet?), and all the pretty sights. I’ll be back Monday to wear you OUT with stories. I’ve missed my blog friends!!!!

JEN

10 comments