Oh, the Things You Say

June 19th, 2009 | Category: Uncategorized

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I know you’re on the edge of your seat for more quotes from my kids. In fact, the local university just called me and said they’d had a ton of requests for applications to their teaching program. It’s true. Teaching is awesome. And if you become one, you can be entertained every hour of every day at school. You’ll never have a bad day. It’s all giggles and zombie references. If these quotes don’t persuade you to educate our youth, then clearly nothing is going to get through to your hard heart.

Me: Who is a famous person you’d like to meet?
Student 1: Mr. T. He eats babies.
Student 2: Nostradamus. He’s smart–in a creepy way.

Me: It’s the last day of your life. What do you do?
Student 1: Repent. . .that would take the first 20 hours.

Me: What would you do if you were guaranteed success?
Student 1: Take over the world. That seems fun.
Student 2: Become a benevolent dictator. In Peru.
Me: Why Peru?
Student 2: Because I like llamas.

Me: What are three things you’re good at?
Student 1: Driving, backpacking, and shooting random things.
Student 2: Kissing.
Me: Ew.

Me: What’s a movie you’d watch over and over?
Student 1: Final Destination.
Me: Why?
Student 1: People get killed. I love it.
Student 2: Labyrinth. I love that movie. Evne though David Bowie is kind of a pedo.

Me: What is something you’re striving to become?
Student 1: Dictator of Togo.

Me: What are you doing on Spring Break?
Student 1: Burn stuff.
Me: Bird stuff?
Student 1: BURN stuff.
Me: Oh, I thought you said bird stuff.
Student 2: Like pooping on statues?

Me: Pick a number between one and 100.
Student: 5.9

Me: You’re going into the witness protection program. You can only take three things with you. What are they?
Student 1: Alicia Keyes.
Student 2: Firearms, 50 rounds of ammo, cleaning kit, secondary weapon, knife, flashlight, signaling mirror, full quart canteen, bedroll, hiking boots, daily rations, advanced medical kit, ten emergency flares ,and five fire extinguishers.
Me: You can’t take all that.
Student 2: It’s okay. I have a donkey to carry it.

Have a great day!!! Sorry for the super short blog. I’m recovering from my jot to Ireland and Scotland. The kilts were so distracting, I just couldn’t think of anything else to write. Can’t wait to share more Wal-Mart Shareholder pics of famous celebs and tell you all about my trip such as my usual packing disaster (crying, sobbing, avoidance in the form of late night lawn mowing), the castles (Mom, I’d like one for Christmas, please), Nessie (I was feeling lucky…), flight anxiety (do they make drugs for this yet?), and all the pretty sights. I’ll be back Monday to wear you OUT with stories. I’ve missed my blog friends!!!!

JEN

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10 comments

10 Comments so far

Carra June 19th, 2009 8:30 am

Those are hilarious! Thanks for sharing–it’s a good way to start a Friday. And it sounds like you had a great trip. Can’t wait to hear about it (and see pictures).
Bethany Ellis June 19th, 2009 8:36 am

Thank you soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much for posting all those student sayings. LOVE them. I always laugh out loud… you have a fun job . Looking forward to hearing about all of your adventures overseas!
Bethany Ellis June 19th, 2009 8:37 am

PS- I think my favorite was the repent one.
Melodie June 19th, 2009 10:32 am

Haha I love your students…especially the repent one! And that last student sounds like Dwight from the Office.
Oh, by the way, your book arrived! Yay! I read it all in one night, stayed up till 2 am. It was really good, though a bit darker than Katie Parker, I thought. I missed Mad Maxine, but I like the younger brother…oh, and Luke…definitely Luke. Sigh. The kiss scene was extremely cute, too, by the way…but oddly enough, it seems like you stole it from me! Because I wrote an (unpublished) story that had pretty much that exact. same. scene.
Sarah June 19th, 2009 1:02 pm

So funny.
And welcome back! I can’t to hear the stories.
Sarah June 19th, 2009 1:17 pm

* wait to hear
Lauren June 19th, 2009 3:20 pm

Today was my last day of school. Your kids are always really funny. I think that one kid and take over Peru. I thik he/she can handle it with humor.
Natalie June 19th, 2009 11:28 pm

I love it when you post funny things your students say. I forwarded these to my mom and dad and we all had a good laugh. Reminded me of bribing them/begging them to be chaperons for trips back when I was a student ministry intern. I think it made them miss it (for, like, a minute or so …)
patty June 21st, 2009 1:24 am

so this is what my teacher’s think… I could totally see some of my teacher’s remembering some pretty random quotes frome me ahh! i love them so much.

facebook quotes!
Ruth June 22nd, 2009 7:05 am

Oh these quotes cracked me up! Thanks for sharing and welcome back!