Congrats to winners of Departures:
Tammy C, who is good at making her life a musical (a must for any happy life)
Lily, who is good at eating ice cream (You’re among friends here, Lily)
Mary, who is a great hugger (more calorie friendly than ice cream)
Naomi, who is good at procrastinating (I totally don’t relate to this.) (Totally lying)
Katelyn, who is excellent at stressing out (eat more ice cream)
Bookwyrm, who is just dandy at lame jokes (Welcome to the club)
Winners, please email me (jen at jennybjones dot com) and send me your home addies, with “departures” in the subject line.
So it’s been raining for about five days straight. We’ve had about one foot of rain and it’s still going. The streets are flooded, my town is under a boil order, tornado warnings every night, and these would be the good points.
I just read a fellow teacher’s Facebook status that an alarm went off and our high school had to evacuate in the torrential rain. Really sorry I left early and missed that one…
I miss the sun. I miss warm weather. I miss dry feet. I miss going to bed without thinking, “Should I unplug my computer? Yes. I don’t want lightning to get it. Should I unplug my TV? No. I do want lightning to get it. . .” This week has made me realize that even if I had known without a doubt that God said to get on Noah’s ark, I might’ve passed. Because cooping me up for forty days in heavy rains would’ve sent me over the brink. By day ten, I would’ve cannonball’d right over the edge. “Shut your face, Noah!”
One of my favorite walking trails is completely submerged and is now one with a nearby lake. I guess I won’t run ten mile sprints today then. . .Maybe tomorrow…
Noah would’ve had one high-maintenance woman on his hands if I had been on that boat. (And I always figure I wouldn’t have been anyway. If there was a .00000000001 percent chance of believing Noah, I wouldn’t have been in that small percentage, don’t you know.) Sometimes I think if Noah had just worded it differently, he could’ve gotten more people on board. Like made the boat decked out with a theme. A casino river boat. Or offered forty days of chocolate. (Move it, Shem, lemme on that boat.) Or offered free wi-fi. Which in that day would be the equivalent of “free pigeon.” Or nighty dinners at the captain’s table. Or had an Acapulco deck like on Love Boat. Or lots of hijinks like on the Love Boat. Or had some mean Uno throw-downs. Some laser tag. Or a little Murder on the Orient Express, where some passengers bit it, and we had to figure out who was the killer. (It’s Ham.)
Oh, well. I wasn’t on the boat, and I will survive the rain.
Have a lovely week. I’m going to think dry thoughts and plan my outfit for the Royal Wedding.
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