Snow Day Manual: Part Deux

As mentioned Friday, I am SURROUNDED by “snow days are bad!” negativity. The Snow Day Prejudice is becoming an epidemic around here as today marks our seventh snow day. And there are certain unnamed people who are right now at this moment poking pins in voodoo dolls with curly hair and short legs.

Thus was born my idea to write The Snow Day Manual. Because this unnatural hated, this bias against frozen precip has cut me to the core. But then I got a revelation from the Lord. And he said, “Jen, they don't hate because they dislike snow. They hate because…they don't understand. Go, therefore, and teach. Teach them the 12th commandment, found in the book of (the signal faded here…) that states ‘Love Thy Snow Day As Thyself.'”  And I said, “Okay, Jesus.”

So if you find yourself disliking The Snow Day maybe it's just because you don't understand it. Because you don't know what to do with this iced in time. Fear not. Me and The Snow Day Manual (available soon from my printer and the back of my Honda) are here to make sure you endure this time effectively.

Friday we covered Sled Day rules.

But not everyone is about jumping on a sled  and zipping down a hill. You people are weird, but I can still work with this.

1. Tip Number 1 for Being Stuck (Blessed to be) Indoors: You Have a Dress Code

Just remember the three word rule: PJs and sweats. Any questions?  Actually I like to wear my running pants and running shoes. Because it reminds me of what I'm NOT doing. And that right there is plenty reason to love a snow day.

2. Tip Number 2: Do not let paranoia set in. Fight it. You do this with:

a. Cookies
b. A well stocked fridge
c. boas
d. Hulu
e. The soundtrack to Urban Cowboy
f. Caffeine
g. A close personal relationship with a lady named Little Debbie
h. Cereal (cannot contain: vitamins, minerals, or fiber)
i. Cheetos
j. Books (no classics or manga)
K. At least one lampshade
L. People mags (which contains about the only crossword I'm smart enough to do).Ignore the “what's different in these 2 pictures” page. You will lose your mind.
M. Access to your Halloween wig collection

Tip Number 3: Lazy is the law
If your butt doesn't make an imprint on the couch, you're not doing it right.

If I had had five minutes alone (in a rated G fashion) with Jack from The Shining, that movie would've ended in a choreographed musical number complete with confetti and jazz hands. Don't fight the snow day. Embrace it.

Finally, I was able to break out Saturday and sled with some friends. Highlight of my winter.

My friend Snow Loving Holly. She is a torpoedo
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About where the photo cuts off is where the hill drops and you get a little air. This would be the spot I would also get a mouth of snow and spend the rest of the descent facing the opposite direction.

Me and the sweet little girl I plowed into.
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She is a trooper. Even with a snow boot in her back.

Sometimes the life of a sledder is hard.
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Don't worry. She's not dead. At least not in that picture.

Okay, that's all my advice for now. I don't want to give away all the good stuff before my book The Snow Day Manual hits the shelves. (And if you are an editor or publisher, let the bidding war begin.)

So how about you guys–what's your favorite thing to do on a snow day (or whatever has you stuck at home and workless/school-less)? If your tips are really good, I might list you as a contributor. . . So let's hear it.

JEN

Click Here to Leave a Comment Below 13 comments
Erin V - February 1, 2010

Philistines. You go, girl. Bring them the message of hope and…lazy fun.

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Michael Warren - February 1, 2010

Your tips are an inspiration to us all! I am a winter girl too. Jon would especially like to see Jack with jazz hands and confetti. Funny girl, your blog posts bring me joy 🙂

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Laura G. - February 1, 2010

The first hour of a snow day for me is spent either sitting or pacing with a big smile on my face, thinking through my options for the day and simply enjoying my good fortune. When I get the news, I can never go back to sleep because I’m too excited. 🙂

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Colene - February 1, 2010

i think you nailed all the things i did this weekend stuck inside! we did get to go sledding (me watching and videoing) and that was nice. but then today, headed to work i got stuck, had to backtrack, and was here at almost 9. which is where i discovered my hatred for snow stems from going to work in it. a perfect monday revelation! ice/snow+work=evil. happy snow day to you

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Sarah - February 1, 2010

Snow days tempt me to switch from public libraries to school libraries!

Your manual is exactly how I would spend my snow days (or in my library world, “holidays where government agencies are closed and no one else”). And I totally cracked up about the People crosswords-they’re the only ones I’m smart enough to figure out too!haha Words-have no idea, but pop culture-I’m on top of it!:)

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Stephanie Morrill - February 1, 2010

A nice hot bubble bath to be enjoyed with hot chocolate (extra whip cream), and a really funny book.

And I’m not even smart enough to do People crosswords, so you’ve got me beat.

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Cassidy - February 1, 2010

We hardly ever get snow days, but I love to watch it snow. And if it isn’t snowing, then I like to just stare at the snow. And take pictures = ) Of course, it’s always an excuse to watch movies = ) Especially with a friend. And especially when you watch a funny movie with a friend and you’re playing board games and stuff = )
It’s the same for rainy days = D

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Stephanie - February 1, 2010

I agree with your philosophy about snow days. I am the snow girl in my family…when a winter weather system is moving into the state I get calls from my family because they know how much I enjoy it. Snow makes me feel like a kid again and on my bad days can always make me smile. Theres just something about the miracle of snow.

You discussed attire for your snow days…well with consecutive ones (and I should really be ashamed for admitting this) I wear the same pair of sweatpants. The first day they’re comfy sure, but after lounging in them a whole day…the next day they are 10 times more comfy because they are all stretched out! Plus I don’t have a washer/dryer in my apartment.

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Heather aka Dynamic Uno - February 2, 2010

I’m so jealous. I WISH we had snow days. We already go to school through June, but snow days would actually make it seem deserved. Oh well. Carry on with the festivities.

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Amy - February 2, 2010

I actually think the Snow Day Manual would be a cute book idea…

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hannah - February 2, 2010

sounds fun! down here in georgia we got 1/4 of an inch 2 weeks ago. thats it. 🙁

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Jenny B. Jones - February 2, 2010

Hannah, I hope you get more than 1/4 inch. That’s just an insult.

Amy, cute? How about life changing! ; ) (I’ll put you down for an endorsement.)

Heather, we’re looking at mid June. And people are not happy.

Stephanie, I’m the snow girl too–I get calls about my take on the forecast because everyone knows I’m watching it/tracking it/obsessing over it.

Cassidy, that’s the spirit! I love to just watch it too. Even if it doesn’t close down school.

Stephanie Morrill, extra whip is DEFINITELY called for! Great suggestion.

Green Bean Teen Queen Sarah, you would make a GREAT school librarian. We need fun, well-read media specialists.

Colene, nobody should have to go to work in the snow. That isn’t right.

Laura G, I usually can’t go back to sleep either. I’m too busy smiling and thinking of all the nothing I’m gonna do.

Michael, hope you guys enjoyed your days off. Thank goodness for side roads, eh?

Thanks for the encouragement, Erin. I know you’re through with winter, so I appreciate the kind thoughts. : )

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jessica - February 18, 2012

We get no snow. Sad isn’t it? I live in southern Louisiana which is about as far south as you can get in the U.S. with the exception of Florida. The last time it snowed here it was in the morning so i slept through it, and the only time i remember it snowing was at least ten years ago. I did however move to OHIO for a couple of years where we did get snow. The first time we got snow flurries there my whole family walked outside in our big coates and looked like idiots because it was just flurries.

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