My Kids Deserve a Grammy

Did you all watch the Grammy's? I thought they were semi-entertaining. Here's the rundown.

Lady GaGa: I'm not a fan. I was at first just because she was so unique and the songs were catchy. But it drives me nuts how many times she works her own name into her performances. I think Lady G is a product of some men in suits who got together and decided to create and market something “different.”  And now the poor girl can't even meet the Queen of England without looking like space trash.  She's imprisoned by her own brand. Or the one they stuck on her. But when she sat down at the piano with Elton John? Fabulous. Elton has STILL got it. Which is a huge relief. The voice is like everything else–it gets saggy and wrinkly too. I'm a huge Motown fan, and I saw Smokey Robinson this past summer. Smokey was a little disappointing. Or maybe I was just too blinded by the sparkly tight pants. No, Mr. Robinson, no!  Anyway, Lady GaGa (stupid name, btw) and Elton? GREAT.

Beyonce: I'm not a fan of backup dancers who look like members of the bomb squad. But I like Beyonce. She is a solid singer. The crotch grabbing did nothing for me. That should die with Michael Jackson. RIP, crotch grab. She also swung that hair around a lot. It kinda cracked me up in places. Check out minute 2:40-2:53.

Black Eyed Peas: I like them a lot. They need to clean up their lyrics, but their music is fun. It's not amazing art, but it's fun. Though again, what's with the army of inner-galactic soldiers? Creepy. But Fergie, thanks for making sun visors cool again. My grandma appreciates it and wants you to consider wearing Keds.

The Michael Jackson tribute: I liked it. I can't help it. Even Celine Dion didn't bother me. Though Carrie Underwood is REALLY skinny.Or maybe it just looked that way WITHOUT my 3-D glasses. Who knew? I felt so left out.

Zac Brown Band: LOVED it. If you hate country, it would've made you miserable. Major bluegrass going on. Highly instrumental. But awesome harmonies. They have a new band member, and I'm loving their sound.

Taylor Swift and Stevie Nicks: Um, wow. I like Taylor and have her CDs (i'm not ashamed). But girl gets a LOT of help sounding so good on her CDs. We all know this. So why put her with a 70s powerhouse? Stevie was banging that tambourine like, “What am I doing? Why, God, why?” It's things like this that make rockers turn to the bottle.

Pink: Didn't love the show or the outfit (flesh colored unitards just never seem to catch on, do they?), but that is my favorite Pink song of all time. It's one of those you hear and immediately script the entire video in your head. It belongs on Broadway and it's a weird cut for a Pink CD.

Mary J and Andrea Bocelli: Fabulous. Omg, YouTube it. I LOVE Mary J Blige.

Eminem and Lil Wayne: I wouldn't know. Ninety percent of it got bleeped out. I'm gonna start trying that in my class. Or family dinners.

(Topic Change!) I had my class write an essay about a favorite possession they could bring to class. I've had some funny lines:

I am the owner of an amazing piece of iPodness.

As long as you are hooked up to wi-fi, you can text your BFF and be all OMG all night long.

The item I chose was my basketball. It's small and round, but it can beat up a video game system.

I was just a wee lad when I got my first basketball. I got it in the middle of the war. The war on me fighting boredom.

My favorite possession is my silver Kodak camera. I took it to school, and the second day I had it, I dropped it in the sink. My sister got the same camera on Christmas, so I stole hers.

When my old phone, Frank, was decapitated, I didn't think I could ever love again.

The best thing about my colorful alarm clock is that it has a huge silver button labeled…snooze. Just like that. In all caps.

My favorite possession is my phone. I bought it in the bathroom at school.

My favorite possession is my truck. It symbolizes freedom. With a truck, you can just jump in and take off when your parents are mad or when Officer Smith is chasing you.

One night my father and I took a trip to Walgreens, which is very unordinary for a Wal-Mart devoted family.

My most prized possession is my scrapbook. It reminds me of the past, gives me something to laugh about, and helps me remember how cute my siblings were so I don't kill them.

Friday is the day I get to drive my mom to the store with my legit permit and go buy groceries.

You know how a baby needs milk to grow? Well, I need Cheezits.

I got my pillow at Wal-Mart while they were having their big “after Christmas” sale. The store was crowded like piranhas  around a lonely fish. I saw that pillow and it was like nothing else existed. Not even the peanut butter filled Santa Claus in the cart.

Finally, sometimes they say things that aren't funny, but still mention-worthy. I read this line five times.
(About his Bible) People say “If I could just hear from God every once in a while, I would believe.” Well,that’s God talking. Sometimes people say that that if they “hear” God it would be different. The truth is, they have heard Him all their lives and never said anything back.

Ninth graders are simply the best.
This week.

See you Friday!
JEN

Click Here to Leave a Comment Below 6 comments
Pattie - February 3, 2010

Those lines are AWESOME! If teaching were like that all the time, I’d still be in the classroom.

Reply
Sheree - February 3, 2010

Thank you for posting a recap of the Grammy’s. I totally missed them. You are so right about Beyonce and her hair flipping. That was good for a laugh.

Reply
Tammy - February 3, 2010

Pink song is AMAZING! I just keep listening to it!
Man oh man was Taylor swift horrible..I was like she has got to know that she sounds horrible doesnt she? I mean I love her albums but I dont think she should sing live anymore.

Your kids are soo funny! I love hearing there stories!!!!

Reply
Natalie - February 4, 2010

I like to wear my unitard while I walk my dog.

That’s my favorite pink song too. My second favorite Pink song is her version of Me and Bobby McGee which is not on iTunes (boo, Pink!) but is on YouTube. She has an amazing voice. I thought the performance at the Grammys was pretty. The fact that she sang while spinning around in the air was quite impressive. I would have puked. I love it when you post snippets from kids in your class 🙂

Reply
Ruth - February 4, 2010

Oh Jenny, your student comments made me laugh so hard!!! Thanks for sharing. And I loved your Grammy rundown…so true about Lady Gaga.

Reply
Nicole O'Dell - February 4, 2010

“Creepy. But Fergie, thanks for making sun visors cool again. My grandma appreciates it and wants you to consider wearing Keds.”

See? That’s why I *heart* you!

Reply

Leave a Reply: