Jeans

IMG_0573Dear Fashion Industry,
I need you to make up your flippin' mind. Are we wearing skinny jeans? Straight leg? Boot cut?
Sigh.We're wearing Flares this year, aren't we?
I really don't care. Aside from pajants, I will wear anything. But I would like to not replace my entire jeans collection EVERY YEAR just because of your whims. I had just donated 400 pairs of flare jeans to Good Will. (Okay, actually I donated them to GAP for a discount. But they said they were sending them to Goodwill. And I believe them.)

So now I am jeans-less. And caught mid-trend. Not one single person here has crossed over to the Flare Side, and I don't want to be the first. Because we all know the first is not going to look cool. The first is going to look like she stepped out of a Woodstock time machine.

But Fashion Industry, I am grateful that you didn't keep pushing the high-waisted jeans. And I appreciate that you haven't brought back the tapered leg. (Mom jeans!)

So, Fashion Czars, I just need to know. Can't y'all put out a newsletter? Maybe slip a note inside my water bill?
In the meantime, I will just wear my yoga pants.
They have never failed me.
With their cottony, looks-good-with-ugly-tshirts, stretchy goodness.
Not sure why they've never been a feature in Vogue.
But I'm certain their day is coming.

**Above photo: a group of us authors got together to eat and talk. While we did lunch, my jeans closet went out of style, back in again, then back out. It's enough to make a girl get dessert…


Click Here to Leave a Comment Below 11 comments
Julie Garmon - August 22, 2011

You always make me laugh. I was just wondering the same thing. xoxo

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Lisa Carter Sweet Tea with a Slice of Murder - August 22, 2011

That video was just wrong on so many levels. 🙂

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Katers - August 22, 2011

I was sure by pajants, you meant the annoyingly socially acceptable trend of wearing pajama pants in public. I have no problem when you wear them to sweep the snow of the desk (guilty) but, to the mall? They even wear them to church now.

It never fails, when I wear yoga pants to the grocery store or quick run to the bank, I run into someone I NEVER see or haven’t seen in years. I’ve learned my lesson.

I know space efficient people like yourself don’t have this problem.. but I personally was excited that Old Navy had jeans on sale over the weekend because this tall girl loves her tall jeans from Old Navy. I kept looking at the flare jeans (not even acknowledging the skinny jeans) and thinking “I know I have a pair of those somewhere in my dresser from about six years ago..” and “I haven’t been 17 in years!” and grabbed the bootcut.

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Katers - August 22, 2011

snow of the desk? The deck. Clearly, the pajama pants have me worked up. I’ll walk it off.

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bookwyrm14 - August 22, 2011

I’m pretty sure skinny jeans are in now, but then again, you’re right, it’s hard to be sure…

I don’t know about you, but I don’t like skinny jeans. They make me feel fat, like I have to stuff myself into them even though the tag says it’s my size. Bootcut and flare are more my style. And I ADORE yoga pants. Honestly, that’s all I wear in the winter.

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Kristin - August 22, 2011

I love flare jeans, but I’ve been forced to switch to bootcut since nobody sells flares anymore.

I refuse to wear skinny jeans. =)

~Kristin

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Kiersten - August 22, 2011

Yes, but check these out…

http://youtu.be/7HD9BmRtdSs

How can you beat both pajamas and jeans… combined? And, they apparently flatter everyone. Win-win.

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Jenny - August 22, 2011

Just a few days ago I have decided that I am unable to keep up with the trends, but whatever minimizes my rear end and waist, while simultaneously making my legs look longer than they are gets my vote. Still looking for that miracle fashion item.

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Shauna - August 22, 2011

I think the skirts-only ladies are onto something, though I refuse to wear a denim jumper. Jeans shopping makes me crazy because I’m apparently whatever length is in between petite and regular—and everything gaps in the back.

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Mary - August 22, 2011

I KNOW! I FINALLY embraced the skinny — and now, flare! What the heck! And how do we wear flared with boots? Does that mean we need to keep a couple of jeggings around just for boot wear?

I give up!

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Jenny B Jones - August 24, 2011

No denim jumpers, Shauna. Unless you wear them with white Keds.

Mary, you should wear jeggings all you can.

Jenny, if you find the miracle jean, let me know.

Kiersten, very cool. : )

Kristin, you are in luck because flares are EVERYWHERE right now.

Bookwyrm, skinny jeans do nothing for me either. Anything that tapers to eensy-weensy toward the bottom is just not a good silhouette.

Katers, Old Navy has GREAT jeans sales.

Lisa, just a little public service video.

Julie, I still don’t have any answers.

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