Can I Blog From Prison?
First of all, stick around for new giveaway details. But that's later.
Right now, you need to know that this is going to be one of those stories that would go much better with pictures.
But I don't have them.
Friday night I decided it had been a long time since I had gotten in the car and gone on a one woman road trip (and that last one went SO successfully), that I would just hop in Blackie and take off for the border. The Arkansas-Oklahoma border, that is. Fab-o author Susan May Warren was going to be speaking to the Tulsa branch of ACFW (American Christian Fiction Writers), and I decided at the last minute I would go. I have been hearing raves about Susan May Warren's teaching forever, but had yet to be able to catch one of her writing classes. Plus Tulsa has a Whole Foods, something my corner of Arkansas does not. (But Whole Foods does not have Snickers, so it all evens out I guess.)
Susie's class was awesome. I took seven pages of notes. Madam Warren and awesome author Rachel Hauck have writing retreats throughout the year. If you can swing it, I highly recommend it. Or you can catch these two authors and more teaching at the ACFW conference in September, which I also highly recommend. You know what I DON'T recommend? Typing with a cat on your keyboard. Because I just typed one of those sentences five times.
The session ended at about 9:45, and I set out for the long trek home. I am happy to report my GPS unit worked a lot better than it did on my last solo voyage out in the middle of nowhere, where it kept telling me to make a left turn off a side of a mountain and repeatedly trying to kill me. (I'm still a little bitter over this, but I think the GPS and I worked out our differences this weekend.) I had JUST the right amount of change left for the turnpike toll. So I pull up to the turnpike at the dark hour of 10:45, throw my coins in…and drop one. Crap! It's dark. A car is coming. I can't find the dang nickle. I dig in my purse and find one solitary dime. Throw it in. Nothing. The green light doesn't turn on, signaling I can go. I dig for more change. I got nothing. NOTHING! Cars…lining up. I'm getting stressed. I can't get out of the car, because I've seen enough Nightmare on Elm Streets to know that just as soon as I do, a murderer will appear out of nowhere and rip out my soul then take off with my '02 Black Wonder. So I throw in a buck…
…and run it.
Tripping an alarm. Sirens blared. Lights flashed. And I just gunned it. As I said on Facebook, it was like the spirit of Burt Reynolds took over my body, and I quoted Smokey and the Bandit all the way home. “My handle is Smokey Bear and I'm tail grabbin' your tail right now!” “Cowboys love fat calves!”
So I hope each of you is prepared to be my one phone call when they hunt me down. I'll probably have to retreat into the woods and go all Unibomber on them. Because they're not taking me alive. Also like the Unibomber, this will involve wearing hoodies. And giving up shaving. (You know, now that I think about it, this won't be too different from any other day…) I figured the state of Oklahoma made money off this deal, so I'm not too worried about it. But if you see my face on America's Most Wanted, do let me know. I've got some family members I've been wanting to one-up. . .
So Over My Head is available on Amazon, which means it could be on the shelves any moment now. Let's start this week by giving one away. To get in the running, all you have to do is tell me when the last time you broke the law. Wait, no. That's not it. The question of the week is: What is a book you're wanting to read next. (not mine.) I just finished reading a few YA books and am on a teen lit kick. Next up is a book recommended by super author Natalie Lloyd, called 100 Cupboards. A book I WANT to read is Crescendo, the follow-up to Becca Fitzpatrick's Hush Hush. It doesn't release 'til November. Hopefully by then they'll have a new cover. The one for Hush Hush was so acclaimed that this one disappointed me. I did a book talk on Hush Hush last week in my classes, and my kids have been speed-reading it and passing it around. Gives me a total librarian high. But…what book are you waiting to read? Let me know by Thursday evening. Preferably before I report to my parole officer. I'll randomly draw a name to announce Friday.
Have a great week!
JEN
